Here are gathered some tips and tricks on how I as a reader think you will get the most out of your reading. Remember, no matter what I say here, you CAN always ask whatever question pops into your mind. There are, however, some topics your reader might not want to read upon (different readers have different opinions on this), and that is their right. I will also touch on these topics shortly in the end.
It’s totally ok to ask general questions, such as ”what will happen next month” or ”tell me something” (both questions I have received), but if you ask general and/or vague questions, you’re probably gonna get answers without too much context.
1. Having a theme is VERY helpful
If you don’t have a specific question in mind, at least give a general theme, such as money, relationships, job etc. At least in my case if a client doesn’t have anything specific in mind, I’ll suggest some themes, but you could do it yourself too. Why waste time on relationship info if you want to know of your job situation? This is good to keep in mind especially if you have a limited time to engage with your reader – the less time you waste on unimportant topics the more depth you will get out of those that actually interest you.
And you can be as specific or vague as you feel like, but it’s better to own your actual wishes and desires. ”Will I meet someone” gives you a different answer than ”Will I meet someone to start a family with”, and ”When will I meet someone to start a family with” is a whole other version. You can of course break this into several questions (time allowing), but it’s never a bad thing to ask the questions that you REALLY want answers for.
2. Think of yourself as an active person and not a passive victim of circumstances.
A tarot reading is like a snapshot into a situation, and sometimes that kind of check-ups are good for taking a step back and getting an ”outsiders view”. Also, it can be helpful to see where a situation is about to develop into, like with a weather report. I use this type of readings often, and asking the basic ”how did this come to be – what’s the present situation – what’s the likely outcome” type of spread is a great starting point.
However, after this information you need to decide what you want to DO with it. If everything is good and you want no changes, perfect. Just keep doing whatever has gotten you this far.
If things look bleak, or you’re in a situation you want to change, you need to continue with a different set of questions. Remember, a tarot reading about the future is not set in stone, but only shows you the likely outcome based on the past and present. By changing your actions you can change the outcomes. You are an active participant and co-creator of your life, so you also need to act like it.
3. If you wish for a particular outcome, it’s ok to ask how to get there.
If you have a goal in mind, instead of ”will I” -questions ask ”HOW will I” -questions. Remember what I said about the reading being a snapshot in time? Well if you want to change jobs but have not really done anything to get that change, and you will ask ”will I get a new job in a year”… Your answer might very well be a ”nope”. Why? Because given the past and the present, that might be the most probable outcome. Don’t wait for the fates or any such ”force” to determine your future. Ask what you need to know or do to get where you want to be.
4. Minimize the guesswork your reader has to go through.
I’ve had clients ask for love readings, without telling me even if they are with someone or not. And although this is totally your right as the querent, well, it won’t get you the best reading possible.
I think this comes from a mistaken assumption that 1. tarot readers are ”supposed to know” that kind of details and 2. we might be trying to trick you, doing what’s known as a ”cold reading” where someone tries to fish out details of your life to convince you of their extraspecial psychic powers and give them your money.
To adress the second point first – yes such things happen, but if you feel that someone is trying to scam you, just don’t go to them for a reading. Or if you happen to be on a call for example, end the call. Just… There’s a ton of readers so pick one that seems non-scammy. And if you think all of us are trying to just trick you – even easier! Don’t get a reading. It’s that simple.
The first point then… We’re actually NOT supposed to know all those details of your life. We’re not necessarily clairvoyants (or claircognisants), so we’re not gonna pick those things up from your thoughts. What knowing your situation gives us is CONTEXT for your reading. It’s faster and easier to read you the cards if I know the context of the question.
It is possible to get a wow-factor through a ”blind” reading, yes, where the reader tells you things from the cards they ”were not supposed to know”, but I’d say you get better quality for your money and time when you don’t expressly withhold information from your reader. You get better answers, nothing more, nothing less. We don’t need to know every single detail, but a general background helps.
Tricky subjects:
Yes/No questions
There are situations where a very short yes/no answer is good, but in most cases I would expend it to a ”what if A/B” question. Think about ”should I quit my job” for example. The questions that come up for me are WHY do you want to quit? What are the consequences (even if the longterm outcome would be favorable)? Quit when, now or in a year? So, instead of ”should I” I would rephrase the question in this way:
I hate my current job because it’s stressful and doesn’t pay enough. I want to change this. Shed me some light into what will happen if I quit now (1st spread/card), quit in near future (2nd spread/card) or try to stick it out (3rd spread/card).
There is a context, and you would get a lot more helpful info, even if you just lift one card per scenario.
Concrete advice
I have a very concrete and practical way of reading, I find. I’m always going for the ”how will you get there” and ”what do I need to know in order to XYZ” questions. However, you need to remember that as tarot readers we tell you what cards show up and how their symbolism ties into the context you have given us. We are NOT financial advisors, therapists, your mom or health care providers. Also, we are not omniscient, and we do make mistakes! Just like everybody. So, listen to the advice and take it with a pinch of salt. Act upon it, while using your own common sense.
Timing
It makes a lot of sense to want to know WHEN exactly something will happen. And sometimes the timing is inherent to a reading, like when I do a reading of ”what will happen in the next three months” and will pick cards for each month in question.
However, exact timing can also be a tricky thing to catch. It certainly is not one of my strong points (which I ALWAYS tell to people asking me about it), but I have a couple of ways to work with this question. One problem however is, that as reading is a snapshot with probabilities of THIS moment, if and when things change the timing can change also. Or, the timing can be hanging on certain things happening FIRST after which the timing gets ”locked in place”, but where it can be hard to pinpoint exactly before those events taking place. So, some poeple have better timing, some worse, and this might not have anything to do with the overall validity of your reading.
(Also, always appreciate when your reader tells you they are not sure about something, or that a certain topic is not their strong point. They’re just being honest, the exact opposite of ”trying to trick you”.)
Reading about other people
This can be seen as an ethics question, or an efficiency question.
Some readers wont read cards on the topic of a third person at all out of an ethical viewpoint. It can be seen as invasive to ask about what someone else thinks of a situation, or what they are doing (questions such as ”does my spouse want to break up” or ”is my spouse cheating on me”). If your reader tells you they wont tell about someone else’s situation, it’s usually useless to try to press them on the subject. That’s their choice and you’ll just have to respect that.
(Remember – you can always try to contact a reader and ask them for their professional guidelines beforehand, and they should be happy to give them to you!)
Others, such as myself, don’t see this as an ethical question and might answer the questions above. However, I usually ask the client also what they will do about it. Or is it actually important information for them. This comes back to empowering readings, often we are too involved in other people’s business and not invested enough on our own business. The actual question might not be as much the cheating but how you feel in your own relationship. Are you wondering if you spouse wants to break up, or are YOU feeling like the realtionship needs to end? This comes again to the question of being an active agent or a sidelines watcher of your own life. After you have the advice from the cards (and again remember, mistakes can be made!), you need to take action.
Asking the same question over and over again
This one is easy to answer. If you ask the same question over and over again but do not take the steps given to you to do the change you are after, nor has there been a major change in your circumstances, one of these two things will happen:
1. You will get the exact same advice as before – sometimes even the exact same cards. It can be spooky.
2. You will get the message of ”you know already what you need to do”.
I’ve seen both happen, numerous times, so trust me on this one. Just asking the question again doesn’t give you the answer you’re looking for, and if you go eery time to the same reader for this, it becomes very tiring for your reader too to deliver you the same news over and over again.
Health
This then again is one of my own boundaries. I know there are readers giving health advice based on the cards, but I really do not wish to do it. I can read for pointers what to do in order to take action to better your situation, but I do not do ”am I sick”, ”what is wrong with my XYZ body part”, ”am I gonna ever get healed” etc type of questions. If you want a health reading, you need to go to someone who does them.
In closing…
All of these pointers are things that I honestly feel will get you a better reading. That being said, there is no ”Perfect Question” and often the best approach is to start with one question and then make another one from that point.
If you have limited time go with one or max 2 subjects so thaat you can get at least a couple of cards drawn for each topics. One card readings have a limited usefulness.
And if you get a ”bad reading”, meaning bad news, don’t be afraid. It’s better to be forewarned, right? That way you can either implement some changes or make yourself ready for the ride.
I hope this has helped you and that you will have a lot of fun with your readings, with whomever you have them!